Hard Time: New Edition by Attwood Shaun

Author:Attwood, Shaun [Attwood, Shaun]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Gadfly Press
Published: 2014-10-15T04:00:00+00:00

Chapter 24

The glut of drugs and cigarettes in Tower 6 is thanks in part to the keystering skills of the car thief Magoo, a tall bespectacled hippy with greasy straggly hair and a spattering of crystal-meth sores on his face. He prides himself on his ability to stuff long packages into his anal cavity. Magoo sets himself up as a mule for hire. His fee: a percentage of what he smuggles in. At Visitation, I watch Magoo observing the guards through thick-lensed glasses. When a querying visitor distracts Officer Green, Magoo receives cellophane-wrapped packages under the table, which disappear into his trousers. He doesn’t even flinch as he deposits them deep enough in his behind so as not to peek out during the strip search. He receives numerous visits each week from strangers bearing such packages and never gets caught or sent to a dry cell to crap, even though after each visit he walks in a bandy-legged leaning-back way as if he’s been speared in the behind.

Our sense of community spirit rises when we adopt a needy youngster named Slopester as our son. Eighteen-year-old Slopester was living on the streets of Sunnyslope, a crack and crystal meth hub of Phoenix, with his younger sister. With his mouth closed, he’s handsome. But he smiles constantly, displaying a graveyard of brown teeth. Caught shoplifting clothes from Dillard’s in Paradise Valley Mall, he’d pulled a butterfly knife on an employee. Arrested in the parking lot, he was charged with assault with a dangerous weapon. In minimum-security, the gangs had preyed upon him. After receiving numerous tickets for fighting, he was reclassified to Towers jail. Marco puts him to work offering a hand-laundry service. The jail replaces our laundry once a week, but in the meantime our underwear and towels collect filth and sweat. For one item of candy, Slopester hand-washes two items of clothing. “Bleach is free,” he titters as he closes his sales. Prior to visits from Claudia, I take advantage of his laundry service. I also pay him to barter for state cheese. He brings me so many oily processed slices that they repeat on me for hours. Even though I’m ravenous, I have to tell him to stop because the cheese is making me ill. Needed and cared for, Slopester blossoms. We rejoice to see him happy. Other youngsters notice his growing importance and he becomes the king of the waifs.

The atmosphere grows increasingly circuslike. Newcomers add to the furore. Kyle arrives from lockdown. His last fight had yet again resulted in his opponent crapping. Upon regaining consciousness, his opponent had been ordered by the head of the whites to clean the crap off the floor. Kyle and a skinny black inmate do daily back-flip shows off the chow tables. The competition between them delights us.

On Christmas Eve, we parade around singing “Felice Navidad” and our favourite Jumping Bill songs. A few days later, seeking adventure outside of the pod, Marco takes most of the whites to Muslim services. We outnumber the Muslim congregation.

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